Home
My Favorite Quotes
Hits 51 to 75 of 135
 Erma Bombeck - “I was leafing through a magazine where there was a before-and-after picture of a woman who went from a size 5 to a size 3 by liposuction. Was she serious I've cooked bigger turkeys than her before picture.”
 Erma Bombeck - “I was going to have inner peace if I had to break a few heads to do it.”
 Erma Bombeck - “You have to love a nation that celebrates its independence every July 4, not with a parade of guns, tanks, and soldiers who file by the White House in a show of strength and muscle, but with family picnics where kids throw Frisbees, the potato salad gets iffy, and the flies die from happiness. You may think you have overeaten, but it is patriotism.”
 Erma Bombeck - “Graduation day is tough for adults. They go to the ceremony as parents. They come home as contemporaries. After twenty-two years of child-raising, they are unemployed.”
 Erma Bombeck - “My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you”
 Erma Bombeck - “As a graduate of the Zsa Zsa Gabor School of Creative mathematics, I honestly do not know how old I am”
 Erma Bombeck - “Great dreams... never even get out of the box. It takes an uncommon amount of guts to put your dreams on the line, to hold them up and say, How good or how bad am I That's where courage comes in.”
 Erma Bombeck - “I have a hat. It is graceful and feminine and give me a certain dignity, as if I were attending a state funeral or something. Someday I may get up enough courage to wear it, instead of carrying it.”
 Erma Bombeck - “I've never vied for power in the family before. Pointing a box at the garage door and saying Open was never a big deal, but holding that television tuner and realizing I alone control what is flashed on the screen brings out the Iacocca in me.”
 Erma Bombeck - “For years my wedding ring has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my husband numerous times at parties that it's time to go home. It has been a source of relief to a dinner companion. It has been a status symbol in the maternity ward.”
 Erma Bombeck - “For years my wedding ring has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my husband numerous times at parties that it's time to go home. It has been a source of relief to a dinner companion. It has been a status symbol in the maternity ward.”
 Erma Bombeck - “There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.”
 Erma Bombeck - “Making coffee has become the great compromise of the decade. It's the only thing real men do that doesn't seem to threaten their masculinity. To women, it's on the same domestic entry level as putting the spring back into the toilet-tissue holder or taking a chicken out of the freezer to thaw.”
 Erma Bombeck - “I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes.”
 Erma Bombeck - “There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.”
 Erma Bombeck - “Somewhere it is written that parents who are critical of other people's children and publicly admit they can do better are asking for it.”
 Erma Bombeck - “In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced in television.”
 Erma Bombeck - “Children make your life important.”
 Erma Bombeck - “All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.”
 Erma Bombeck - “It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows”
 Erma Bombeck - “I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms ''Checkout Time is 18 years.''”
 Erma Bombeck - “I'm going to stop punishing my children by saying, Never mind I'll do it myself.”
 Erma Bombeck - “No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there is wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick.”
 Erma Bombeck - “Never have more children than you have car windows.”
 Erma Bombeck - “In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced on television.”

Show Page 1
1
Show Page 2
2
Show Page 3
3
Show Page 4
4
Show Page 5
5
Show Page 6
6