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Erma Bombeck Quotes

Erma Bombeck Erma Bombeck
God created man, but I could do better.

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I am not a glutton I am an explorer of food.

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If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally brain dead.

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There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.

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Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.

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Dreams have only one owner at a time. That's why dreamers are lonely.

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It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows.

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As a graduate of the Zsa Zsa Gabor School of Creative mathematics, I honestly do not know how old I am.

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Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

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A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend - and he's a priest.

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