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Lily Tomlin Quotes

Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.

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If the formula for water is H2O, is the formula for an ice cube H2O squared

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Delusions of grandeur make me feel a lot better about myself.

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The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you're still a rat.

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I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.

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I always wondered why somebody doesn't do something about that. Then I realized I was somebody.

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The best mind-altering drug is the truth.

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For fast acting relief, try slowing down.

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No matter how cynical you get, it is impossible to keep up.

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The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool.

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Just remember, we're all in this alone.

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I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.

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Forgiveness means giving up all hope for a better past.

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Reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.

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If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in a library.

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Why is it when we talk to God, we're said to be prayingbut when God talks to us, we're schizophrenic

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We're all in this alone.

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A sobering thought what if, at this very moment, I am living up to my full potential

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We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.

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If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question

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