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Robert Orben Quotes

Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.

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Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.

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If you can laugh together, you can work together.

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Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time'

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A compliment is verbal sunshine.

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I should warn you that underneath these clothes I'm wearing boxer shorts and I know how to use them.

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With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they'd bust it to Corporal

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If those scientists are so smart, why do they all count backward

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Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.

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Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother rather than all major credit cards.

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Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator.

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It may be the way the cookie crumbles on Madison Avenue, but in Honk Kong it's the way the egg rolls.

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A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in.

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Inflation is the crabgrass in your savings.

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Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket.

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To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so.

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