Artemus Ward Quotes

You have Van Gogh’s ear for music.

I have given two cousins to war and I stand ready to sacrifice my wife’s brother.

Tain’t people’s ignorance that does so much harm; ’tis their knowin’ so much that ain’t so.

People who like this sort of thing will find this is the sort of thing they like.

Let us all be happy and live within our means, even if we have to borrow the money to do it with.

“Thrice is he armed that hath his quarrel just” And four times he who gets his fist in fust.