Kinky Friedman Quotes

God created whiskey to keep the Irish from taking over the world.

Kill Two Birds and Get Stoned.

In six days the Lord created the heavens and the earth and all the wonders therein. There are some of us who feel that He might have taken just a little more time.

A happy childhood is the worst possible preparation for life.

I rarely meddled in the cat’s personal affairs and she rarely meddled in mine. Neither of us was foolish enough to attribute human emotions to our pets.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

“I’m not afraid to die,” I said. “I’m not afraid to live. I’m not afraid to fail. I’m not afraid to succeed. I’m not afraid to fall in love. I’m not afraid to be alone. I’m just afraid I might have to stop talking about myself for five minutes.”