Insurance Quotes

Almost every idea I have that’s fun doesn’t sound that way to an insurance adjuster or a jury.

I’ve always had to deal with insurance problems. My insurance was actually canceled at one point because someone sued me saying that they had been hurt seriously by a candy bar in the balcony. Somehow a candy bar I hit with a tennis racket so the people on the balcony could have candy?

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?

I will get it when I die. (When someone told Yogi he was foolish for buying a lot of insurance, and asked what good all that money would do him)

Insurance, n. An ingenious modern game of chance in which the player is permitted to enjoy the comfortable conviction that he is beating the man who keeps the table.

A new way to protect families from becoming poor is “life insurance,” many people putting money into a common fund or “pool.” When an insured person, one who has put money into the fund, dies, money from the common supply is paid out to his or her wife or husband or children. This protects them […]