emo philips Quotes

emo philips

The American government is making nuclear weapons like there's no tomorrow.

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I have a lot more things to talk about now because I'm an adult.

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I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy.

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I think of my body as a temple. Or at least a relatively well-managed Presbyterian youth center.

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Whatever happened to the good ole days, when children worked in factories

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I'm a great lover, I'll bet.

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Well, my brother says Hello. So, hooray for speech therapy.

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My mother was like a sister to me, only we didn't have sex quite so often.

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I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two'

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I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.

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How many people here have telekinetic powers Raise my hand.

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I got some new underwear the other day. Well, new to me.

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