If we could just find out who's in charge, we could kill him. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
- George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
Religion is just mind control. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
Some people see things that are and ask, Why Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
You know the good part about all those executions in Texas Fewer Texans. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
You get to play with people's little danger zones. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
Writing books isn't a drastic departure from writing for the stage. I've always written in the long format, five, eight, 10-minute pieces rather than one-liners, so since writing books, the process hasn't changed much. A piece in my live routine can end up as part of one of my HBO specials, and it can also end up in one of the books. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
They call it the 'American Dream' because you have to be asleep to believe it. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
I tell ya, if I hadn't chosen the career of being a performer, I think linguistics would have been a natural area that I'd have loved -- to teach it, probably, ... Language has always fascinated me. There's a genetic inheritance there ... a good language gene, which I inherited from my mother and grandfather and she fostered that in me as he fostered that in her. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
He had a sort of pain that was fairly evident. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
What are you going to do, play with your prick for another 20 to 30 years,Read People Magazine your whole life... Take a freakin' chance - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
One thing i don't understand is sex is legal and selling things is legal but selling sex is illegal. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
He appreciated its compounded vulgarity, ... It had that Peter Finch in 'Network,' 'I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore' quality. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
I do this real moron thing, it's called thinking, and I'm not a very good Amercian because I like to form my own opionions. - George Carlin Visit FamousQuotes.com for more inspirational quotes
Vernon Jordan, Civil Rights Leader, Dies at 85