Bill Vaughan Quotes

Pipe-smokers spend so much time cleaning, filling and fooling with their pipes, they don’t have time to get into mischief.

The whale is endangered, while the ant continues to do just fine.

A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works.

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.

Some idea of inflation comes from seeing a youngster get his first job at a salary you dreamed of as the culmination of your career.

Maybe the answer to Selective Service is to start everyone off in the army and draft them for civilian life as needed.

The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas.

If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it’s another nonconformist who doesn’t conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity.

A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm.

A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won’t cross the street to vote in a national election.