Jerome K. Jerome Quotes

Well, you don’t look for much of a voice in a comic song. You don’t expect correct phrasing or vocalization. You don’t mind if a man does find out, when in the middle of a note, that he is too high, and comes down with a jerk. You don’t bother about time. You don’t mind […]

It is always the best policy to tell the truth, unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar.

Opportunities flit by while we sit regretting the chances we have lost, and the happiness that comes to us we heed not, because of the happiness that is gone.

Punch invariably referred to me as ” ‘Arry K ‘Arry’ and would then proceed to solemnly lecture me on the sin of mistaking vulgarity for humour and impertinence for wit.

Idleness, like kisses, to be sweet must be stolen.

It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do.

I did not intend to write a funny book, at first. I did not know I was a humorist. I have never been sure about it. In the middle ages, I should probably have gone about preaching and got myself burned or hanged.

I want a house that has got over all its troubles. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life bringing up a young and inexperienced house.

They (dogs) never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation.

I can enjoy feeling melancholy, and there is a good deal of satisfaction about being thoroughly miserable; but nobody likes a fit of the blues. Nevertheless, everybody has them; notwithstanding which, nobody can tell why. There is no accounting for them. You are just as likely to have one the day you have come into […]