Conspiracy Quotes

The search for conspiracy only increases the elements of morbidity and paranoia and fantasy in this country. It romanticizes crimes that are terrible because of their lack of purpose. It obscures our necessary understanding, all of us, that in this life there is often tragedy without reason.

The world has become one big grassy knoll, crawling with lone gunmen who think they’re the Warren Commission.

The central belief of every moron is that he is the victim of a mysterious conspiracy against his common rights and true deserts. He ascribes all his failure to get on in the world, all of his congenital incapacity and dam foolishness, to the machinations of werewolves assembled in Wall Street, or some other such […]

Anyone who knows how difficult it is to keep a secret among three men – particularly if they are married – knows how absurd is the idea of a worldwide secret conspiracy consciously controlling all mankind by its financial power; in real, clear analysis these deep plots are seldom anything more sinister than the usual […]

I have been a conspirator for so long that I mistrust all around me.

Conspiracies no sooner should be formed than executed.

Decency is indecency’s conspiracy of silence.

In some causes silence is dangerous; so if any know of conspiracies against their country or king, or any that might greatly prejudice their neighbor, they ought to discover it.

All professions are conspiracies against the laity.

But so much of daily life is organized by the conspiracies of the jokeless: the dehumanizers, those who dread perspective, balance, thought. Lord deliver us from the humorless – I fear Fowler has fallen into their clutches. Moral: don’t make jokes. Ever. The humorless always win.