Ogden Nash Quotes

The swan can swim while sitting down. For pure conceit he takes the crown. He looks in the mirror over and over And claims to have never heard of Pavlova.

Too clever is dumb.

Merry Christmas, Nearly Everybody!

People can’t concentrate properly on blowing other people to pieces properly if their minds are poisoned by thoughts suitable to the 25th of December.

Children aren’t happy without something to ignore, And that’s what parents were created for.

The Preacher, the Politicain, the Teacher, Were each of them once a kiddie. A child, indeed, is a wonderful creature. Do I want one? God Forbiddie!

They take the paper and they read the headlines, so they’ve heard of unemployment and they’ve heard of bread lines, and they philanthropically cure them all by getting up a costume charity ball.

Senator Smoot (Republican, Ut.) Is planning a ban on smut. Oh rooti-ti-toot for Smoot of Ut. And his reverend occiput. Smite, Smoot, smite for Ut., Grit your molars and do your dut., Gird up your l–ns, Smite h-p and th-gh, We’ll all be Kansas By and by. Smite, Smoot, for the Watch and Ward, For […]

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it’s always a cat.

Certainly there are things in life that money can’t buy, but it’s very funny Did you ever try buying them without money?