P.J. O'Rourke Quotes

Thanksgiving is so called because we are all so thankful that it only comes once a year.

The Marine Corps does more for world peace than all the Ben and Jerry’s ice cream ever made.

Then there was communism’s weak-tea sister, socialism. Socialists maintained that we shouldn’t take all the money away from all the people since all the people don’t have money. We should take all the money away from only the people who make money. Then, when we run out of that, we could take more money from […]

The Tenth Commandment sends a message to socialists, to egalitarians,. to people obsessed with fairness… to everyone who believes that wealth should be redistributed. And the message is clear and concise: Go to hell.

I asked Janerik Larsson – executive vice president and director of communications at a media conglomerate with the conglomeration of a name Industriforvaltnings ABB Kinnevik – why Swedes still worked. If they don’t work, they get almost what they would get if they did work. And if they do work, their raises and bonuses are […]

What happens to Sweden when nobody’s willing to lend it more money and the Swedes realize that they really can skip work for four months if the kid pukes? The people of Sweden – like Damocles – are set down to a sumptuous feast, and overhead, suspended by a hair is… not a sword, this […]

The sport of skiing consists of wearing three thousand dollars’ worth of clothes and equipment and driving two hundred miles in the snow in order to stand around at a bar and get drunk.

Lust, Pride, Sloth, and Gluttony, or, as we call them these days, “getting in touch with your sexuality,” – “raising your self-esteem,” – “relaxation therapy,” and “being a recovered bulimic.”

Actually there is no way of making vomiting courteous. You have to do the next best thing, which is to vomit in such a way that the story you tell about it later will be amusing.

I’m a registered Republican and consider socialism a violation of the American principle that you shouldn’t stick your nose in other people’s business except to make a buck.