You must realize that the computer has it in for you. The irrefutable proof of this is that the computer always does what you tell it to do.

General Failure’s Fault. Not Yours.

The attention span of a computer is only as long as its electrical cord.

Hit any user to continue.

The Lord is my programmer, I shall not crash. He installed his software on the hard disk of my heart; all of His commands are user-friendly. His directory guides me to the right choices for His name’s sake. Even though I scroll through the problems of life, I will fear no bugs, for He is […]

Hardware, n.: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.

Scandisk is now checking your hard disk. You can start praying.

Applying computer technology to a problem is simply a matter of finding the right wrench to pound in the correct screw.

Want to make your computer go really fast? Throw it out a window.